Critique My Internet Sales Process - Price Quote

Stephen Brown
I got some great feedback when I tried this with my AutoResponder. Below, is my new car price quote template (I have a slightly different one for used cars) that I would love to get your feedback on: Hi [INSERT CUSTOMER FIRST NAME], Thank you for the interest in our [INSERT MODEL] and the opportunity to earn your business. The invoice below includes freight and [PUT ALL THE OPTIONS HERE], minus the VALUE OF YOUR TRADE. The value can't be finalized until our appraiser physically verifies the condition, and he can do that while you're test driving this [INSERT MODEL]. Would later this evening or tomorrow work better to drop by? I gaurantee that you will drive this [INSERT MODEL] home knowing that you got a fair deal. [INSERT YEAR] [INSERT MAKE] [INSERT MODEL] [picture goes here] MSRP: $ Dealer Invoice: $ I have also included the invoice on a similar [INSERT MODEL]: [picture goes here] MSRP: $ Invoice Price: $ We also have similar Certfieid Pre-Owned model. Benefits include lower purchase price and an extended warranty. You can see information on VW's Certification program here. Internet Price: $ You can find directions to VW Springfield here, and I look forward to earning your business. Thank you again for the opportunity! Prices do not include taxes or any other fees. Cannot be combined with any other offers. Good for 7 days or the end of the month whichever occurs first.
Jim Bell
If you copied and pasted this, I see a few typos in it. You have 'gaurantee' spelled wrong. Should be guarantee. I also see in the Certified plug as Certified being spelled wrong. I would try to put the call to action at the bottom of the email of 'would later this evening or tomorrow work better to drop by.' Also, with inventory levels where they are, I don't think that you have to drop your pants right off the bat being a VW dealer. (I am guessing you are a single point dealer?) If you are a single point, I would focus more on an appointment with the customer and building value in dealing with your business. That's my 2 cents.
Stephen Brown
Unfortunately, I did. WebControl in all their wisdom doesn't have a spell check. Even worse, I'm one of the better spellers
Dave Erickson
On the vehicle they inquired about you call it a "dealer invoice" and on the similar vehicle you call it "invoice price" I'm not sure which one would be better to use, but it might be a good idea to stay consistent. I'm also not a big fan of using invoice so quickly in the process. I think referring to a "selling price" might be a better idea or even "Your Internet Discount = $." Maybe this discount includes all available incentives and promotions (loyalty, etc.) which you would ultimately need to discuss with them to verify what they qualify for? I also like questions that are more likely to generate a response and back and forth interaction quickly and on a highly personalized level because it helps me to establish a relationship with the customer before my competitors. Instead of questions such as asking when the customer can stop by (which nearly everyone asks) I ask questions that are easier to answer and require less commitment from the customer to respond to. Maybe ask them if they are going to lease or buy and if you could calculate a quote for them? This is a lot easier to respond to and appeals to their inquisitive nature. The result being you are building a relationship through these responses. When I look into my CRM’s sold customer list I notice that most of my customers had about 7-8 back and forth emails. Unless I’m just killing everyone in pricing (which would be pointless) it’s pretty infrequent that I send a quote and the person just comes in or agrees to, which is why I'm really going for good back and forth contact. Just some ideas. Overall though your template I believe leaves a pretty good impression on a customer that you are someone who’s going to be easy and open with on the deal and I think that’s what a lot of people are looking for.

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