Congruent
Master This to Avoid Dealership Drama
On this week’s podcast, I spoke with the AJ Amyx, a growth strategist for creative entrepreneurs. I’m a big fan of AJ’s energy and insight, so I was glad to get him on the pod. I’m really happy with this episode and the CLARITY it brings to some life concepts that are important to me.
Mutual Agreements vs. Unspoken Expectations
A big standout from our conversation was the concept of agreements versus expectations. This is a personal one for me. I take clarity seriously. Good communication is one of my core values. And even I end up falling into the trap of expectations.
It’s easy to leave a conversation thinking you’re on the same page with someone -- that you have an explicit agreement -- when all you really have are expectations on both sides. Say you meet up with a colleague you see occasionally and leave things on the note that you’ll “connect soon”. Does that mean making a phone call or sending a follow-up email? When are you supposed to connect, tomorrow or next week? This sort of thing happens all the time. AJ and I talked about how important it is to stop leaving expectations and start making agreements.
Download This Episode's Worksheet on Avoiding Workplace Drama
The Drama Triangle
The Drama Triangle was the other concept that resonated with me. It’s a lot to get into here, but you should skim the Wikipedia page or this article. While the article focuses on personal relationships, like I said at the top, I believe that “work life” and “home life” are all part of the same field. Improving your understanding of relationships will help your entire life.
The Drama Triangle appealed to me because it’s an intuitive way to see when you’re slipping into negative positions. I frequently try to play the “Hero” and fix everything for everyone. That ends up making people too dependent on you and takes away their power. It’s also easy to fall into the “Villain” box and have a super negative outlook and effect on people. Or the “Victim” role, where you feel like the world’s out to get you and you feel powerless.
Did This Resonate with You?
I love meeting like-minded people. We get inspired off each other's experiences and ideas, and it brings a new perspective. If you connected with anything we said in the podcast or simply have a question you're struggling with, you're always welcome to drop me an email or connect on social.
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2 Comments
Derrick Woolfson
Beltway Companies
Great article! One of thing that comes to mind regarding the "drama triangle," and the being the hero is that is a much larger issue than of what meets the eye. By that I mean dealers struggle with giving their managers the autonomy or ability to lead their staff. With that said, it trickles down into the staff, which means they struggle with making decisions, or worry about whether or not they made the wrong decision. Hence, the 'negative' vibes that managers often act upon on the floor. I vividly remember one of the sales managers I worked with always being negative, everything was wrong, everyone was out to get them, etc. As a result, it had a profound impact on the overall morale of the dealership. All that to say is the more autonomy your management has to handle situations empowering their employees will all have a positive impact on your dealership. Of course, this is not to say that you will still face issues, but at least your managers will be equipped to handle the situation.
Paul J Daly
Congruent
Great points! Without a doubt, the leader sets the tone and effects EVERY level of their organization. One of my favorite books that illustrates this is "Its Your Ship" by Capt. Mike Abrashoff
https://www.amazon.com/Its-Your-Ship-Management-Anniversary/dp/145552302X