I had this phenomenal idea the other day. Truth be told, it came to me months ago but I finally had a moment to bring the concept to fruition this week. My idea involved our Tonka Truck.
Just a hot Tonka, looking for love.
My idea involved the popular dating app, Tinder. I thought, “How great would it be to have the Tonka looking for love? Looking for a match?” I felt that my genius could only be outdone by my creativity. I was excited for my own awesomeness.
I know about Tinder from a few of my friends that swipe on a daily basis. For those not in the know, you are presented with the image of someone, and swipe a direction depending on if you like or dislike someone. Superficial, maybe. Perfect place for a publicity stunt involving the Tonka? Absolutely.
I downloaded the app, and went to set up the account. Here’s where it gets funny, people. I did not know they needed your Facebook account. When I opened the app, it asked to sync with my Facebook. I thought, well…Cox Motors is a page that I use in conjunction with my personal account, so it must have the versatility to let me select “Use Tinder as Page” or something like that. Yeah, not so much. Tinder immediately pulled all of my personal information and created a Tinder account…sending “alerts” to everyone on Tinder that I was now on Tinder looking for a match.
Errr…maybe if I was single, I would have laughed it off and had a little swipe fun for myself. However, being that I am absolutely not single, I quickly broke into a panic and started sweating. All of a sudden, my phone started having a seizure from the activity on Tinder. More panic ensued.
I thought I could set up a Facebook account for the Tonka, and still have my Tonka Tindering be a success. Facebook barred me from trying to sign up. It’s algorithm was too wise for me – it knew Tonka was a truck – not a human. Meanwhile, my phone is still seizing. What the hell do I do? I didn’t want people in my area or in my social circle think I was out carousing on some superficial dating app! All I could think of was trying to explain myself and prove it was an innocent mistake.
Finally, I came to the conclusion my Tonka Tinder idea was a colossal failure. I needed to get rid of Tinder immediately. But oh no no, they make it immensely difficult to delete your profile once everything is synced up. Finding the correct path to deletion took forever. Finally, the little app closed itself down and I uninstalled it from my phone. Relief set in. It was finally over.
Think I can put the Tonka on Match.com?