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Jared Hamilton
From: Jared Hamilton
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Tim Jennings

Tim Jennings Subaru Digital Process Strategist at Shift Digital

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3 Minute Management Course
 
 

 
Lesson One:
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

 
Lesson Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. " They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more ! dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson:
Bull crap might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

 
Lesson Three:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson:
(1) Not everyone who craps on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your friend..
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

This ends the three minute management course.
Jared Hamilton
This is great. That last story needs to be read in every sales meeting across the country.
Mike Sheehy
Great stories, Tim. I agree, more people need to hear these. In some cases, the crap needs to fall on the party responsible. Otherwise, how will they learn? If a mistake is made, then that person needs to be reprimanded, especially if it is made over and over, but at the end of the day it is only because the person doing the crapping wants to make the business more successful. That is where the cliché “It’s not personal, its business” probably came from. Lesson #3 in the third story might not be great if you work in PR, but it sure is funny! -Mike J&L Marketing, Inc.
Gary May
Great post Tim. With automotive retail, we live in a world of mismanagement and dysfunction most of the time. It's that way because it has been accepted for decades. Some retailers are changing that but overall it's the norm. Responsibility for performance is a top-down aspect and needs to be reinforced that way. Some stores call out wrongdoers in their meetings, some privately and some just don't deal with it which perpetuates a whole set of different issues. As with success, consistency is the key in building back from errant decisions. People are going to make mistakes and the opportunity in each failure is learning, assessing, improving and establishing a new precedence if needed. We reap what we sow, no two ways about it. Professionals (ie top dealership management) should remember all of their errors and build a stronger 'community' with examples that support and reinforce rather than tear down. It's no secret that automotive retail is a dog-eat-dog world. It's also a multi-billion-dollar industry that needs a lot more bright spots. Management's greatest challenge and opportunity today is how to improve the experience for their employees and customers. you can be in the car business, oil industry (there's some great opportunity there right now for a certain company), airline business or the corner market. We are in a people business. How are your people treated when they get themselves in, live in and get out of the 'dung'?
Stan Sher
Very nice. You always put something cool up. I love it.
Tom White Jr.
Tim: Entertaining as always and enlightening as well... HOWEVER, here is my dissenting commentary: Lesson One: I don't care how high up you sit, doing nothing equates to a failed business anyway you slice it. No such thing as being above the fold... We as management need to set a better example other than "get where we are so you don't have to do anything anymore and can make a bunch of money." It's not about reaching the top, it's about affecting change and making a difference once you reach the top... Lesson Two: I disagree with this lesson just a tad. Bull Crap is Bull Crap and you can't make it to the top lying, cheating, stealing, and bullshitting your way to the top. This business had changed a great deal in the last six months (let alone the last year or five...) I would like to believe Upper Management has replaced the Bull Shitters with the gals and guys that make things happen everyday... Finally Lesson Three: And this one has me ALL worked up frankly... First, when you are in Deep Shit, you should be the LOUDEST guy yelling... It's not about duck and cover, it's about voicing the challenges your company is facing at top volume... Second, anyone that helps to get you out of the dung IS your friend... (Probably) and if they aren't, too bad for them... When your back is against the wall and you are about to lose your business (as many of my friends have over the last year), you take any hand extended provided you don't have to change your character or sell yourself to the devil... Again, I enjoyed your post, just wanted to throw out my two point five cents per usual... Keep up the good fight my friend... Good things come to those who do good things! just sayin'

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